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Transfer Thread - Should I Stay or Should I Go?


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43 minutes ago, TryNotToSuck said:

To me, it depends on the player. If a player wants to win, then the kid has to be placed at a school that gives him/her the best chance to win. 

If a kid wants to be a “star athlete in high school” then he/she will need to go to a 1A/2A school that will give you way more opportunities to play and you’re able to produce. In addition to that, the chances of him staying in a football game will be longer because a 1A/2A football usually only has 30-40 players on it. The only downside, you’re having amazing stats against terrible teams. 

I will say this, if a coach is willing to sacrifice winning to improve the character of a player, I will get that kid the heck out. If I was a parent, it’s my job to raise my child, not the coach. I see a lot of coaches that gives two flips about winning, but wants to be a dad and improve their character and Yadi Yadi ya. High School athletes wants to win, they don’t want to be better individuals, they want to win and enjoy being high school athletes. No high school kid is going to say “man, we only went 2-8 in football but I sure did improve a whole lot as a person.” 

I respect your opinion but politely disagree. I am a “coach”and I feel part of having good character is how you act and your grades/academic effort. If have seen kids think they can act however they want and they think there should be no consequences. Life doesn’t work that way and we do a tremendous injustice to students when we don’t teach them this early. If I have a kid that can’t stay out of trouble and do everything they can to make the best grades they can (which is different from kid to kid) then they don’t play... point blank. They are a representative of our school and community. 

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37 minutes ago, BIGPURPLEMACHINE said:

I respect your opinion but politely disagree. I am a “coach”and I feel part of having good character is how you act and your grades/academic effort. If have seen kids think they can act however they want and they think there should be no consequences. Life doesn’t work that way and we do a tremendous injustice to students when we don’t teach them this early. If I have a kid that can’t stay out of trouble and do everything they can to make the best grades they can (which is different from kid to kid) then they don’t play... point blank. They are a representative of our school and community. 

Peabody Pride seconds this post !!! Well said !! A coach can do both just ask every Golden Tide player !!!

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4 hours ago, PeabodyPride said:

Peabody Pride seconds this post !!! Well said !! A coach can do both just ask every Golden Tide player !!!

My thoughts exactly... why choose between a good man and a good coach when being the former helps at being the latter. One of the wisest men that I ever had the pleasure of knowing was also one of the most acclaimed coaches in Tennessee ( second only to Coach Tucker in wins when he retired), and his favorite catch phrase was " it's not my job to teach football, it's my job to mold men of character... men of character win you football games". I'd much rather have a man of character running my kid's team than some jerk out to build his resume' by winning at any cost.

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5 hours ago, Salem said:

Playing at the next level is only one factor for justifying a transfer. A positive memory of high school football shouldn't be limited to those good enough to be picked for college. Some schools are academically inferior and some schools have sports programs are horrendous. 

There's another lesson to be learned from this. In your own post you described a positive experience with your son and his team, even though they weren't that great. Now, you say that you'd recommend grandson transferring to a better team... what changed? Will your grandson have a better experience, or will he subconsciously develop the attitude of cutting and running to a "better" situation when the going gets tough? High school sports today, and adulthood tomorrow... marriage, employment, and life in general can be a series of tough times and great ones in the aftermath... if you work through the tough ones.

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5 hours ago, BIGPURPLEMACHINE said:

I respect your opinion but politely disagree. I am a “coach”and I feel part of having good character is how you act and your grades/academic effort. If have seen kids think they can act however they want and they think there should be no consequences. Life doesn’t work that way and we do a tremendous injustice to students when we don’t teach them this early. If I have a kid that can’t stay out of trouble and do everything they can to make the best grades they can (which is different from kid to kid) then they don’t play... point blank. They are a representative of our school and community. 

+1^^^

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11 hours ago, tradertwo said:

There's another lesson to be learned from this. In your own post you described a positive experience with your son and his team, even though they weren't that great. Now, you say that you'd recommend grandson transferring to a better team... what changed? Will your grandson have a better experience, or will he subconsciously develop the attitude of cutting and running to a "better" situation when the going gets tough? High school sports today, and adulthood tomorrow... marriage, employment, and life in general can be a series of tough times and great ones in the aftermath... if you work through the tough ones.

What changed? Life and experience. Is a coach who has success with a small classification, rural high school and then leaving  for a much better 5A or 6A gig cutting and running? Over the years I've seen good kids with tons of ability stay in poor situations and have their talent completely wasted. I've seen talented kids with great attitudes stay loyal to their program and have a completely miserable high school experience due to poor leadership from coaches and or administration. I've seen coaches have a team meeting and look his guys in the eye and talk about commitment, loyalty, and team while he had interviewed at every open position in the area and was negotiating his new contract elsewhere.  The future is hard to predict but I've seen several players leave and while a few situations didn't pan out the majority did. Each situation is unique and the decision should be based on a lot of factors. 

 

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18 hours ago, TryNotToSuck said:

To me, it depends on the player. If a player wants to win, then the kid has to be placed at a school that gives him/her the best chance to win. 

If a kid wants to be a “star athlete in high school” then he/she will need to go to a 1A/2A school that will give you way more opportunities to play and you’re able to produce. In addition to that, the chances of him staying in a football game will be longer because a 1A/2A football usually only has 30-40 players on it. The only downside, you’re having amazing stats against terrible teams. 

I will say this, if a coach is willing to sacrifice winning to improve the character of a player, I will get that kid the heck out. If I was a parent, it’s my job to raise my child, not the coach. I see a lot of coaches that gives two flips about winning, but wants to be a dad and improve their character and Yadi Yadi ya. High School athletes wants to win, they don’t want to be better individuals, they want to win and enjoy being high school athletes. No high school kid is going to say “man, we only went 2-8 in football but I sure did improve a whole lot as a person.” 

This is a terrible take.   Yeh you want to win and that is everybody's goal but you want to win with respectful kids as well.

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My older son did not have a good experience with the high school team he played for. Mainly due to coaching/program culture  issues that I became aware of after the fact.

My younger son went to a different school. Loves it. He goes to school happy, he comes home from practice happy. My two son's experiences are night and day different.

While I am proud of my older son for sticking out a tough situation, in hindsight, I should have transferred him. If I had been aware of the culture situation before he graduated, I would have transferred him even if I had to rent an apartment in another school zone.

As a dad, you have to do whats best for your kids, football is a small part. You have ask yourself "What's the best decision I can make for the overall character development, future, educational experience and happiness of my child?"

 

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1 minute ago, 32hammer said:

My older son did not have a good experience with the high school team he played for. Mainly due to coaching/program culture  issues that I became aware of after the fact.

My younger son went to a different school. Loves it. He goes to school happy, he comes home from practice happy. My two son's experiences are night and day different.

While I am proud of my older son for sticking out a tough situation, in hindsight, I should have transferred him. If I had been aware of the culture situation before he graduated, I would have transferred him even if I had to rent an apartment in another school zone.

As a dad, you have to do whats best for your kids, football is a small part. You have ask yourself "What's the best decision I can make for the overall character development, future, educational experience and happiness of my child?"

 

Exactly. Parents may be loyal to a certain school but it’s the child’s life and the best decision for him or her is what needs to be made. 

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3 minutes ago, sum1uno said:

Exactly. Parents may be loyal to a certain school but it’s the child’s life and the best decision for him or her is what needs to be made. 

Yes sir. I'll tell a story sometime of some "grown ups" reaction to a kid transferring. You'll get a kick out of it then understand why parents take their kids somewhere else.

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