It doesn't have to be that way if you don't want it to be that way, at least not at your school.
I've brought teams to the Northwest (Nike Team Nationals), the Midwest (Roosevelt Relays in Dayton, OH), the Northeast (Nike Indoor Nationals), Virginia (Maymont), and all over the Southeast. The key is that each of these events was huge--the best competition, the teams and individuals who cared. That rubs off on kids and on a program--it's hard to accept less than that when you've been there.
I'm not sure why anyone cares about respect, though. Do what you do and don't worry about what anyone else thinks.