High school coaches vs parent tolerance

[catchman]

Parents you send your daughter to a trainer for 2 or more years,which is not cheap. Then comes high school, all of a sudden the coach tells her everything she is doing is wrong. Just because its not done his way or the way his favorite training school teaches or starts making adjustments with out ever seeing how your daughter can perform with what she has been taught. He lets your daughter know this with word that a english teacher could never get away with in class. O yes parent, never go to pratice you might get your daughter in trouble or removed from the team. Think it might be they dont want you to se the way they treat the players,or you might hear the four letter words or see the coach adjusting himself, or the personial remarks from the lady coach. { NOT ALL COACHES PRATICE THIS, but there is a large amount of them that do.]

Is this what you want you daughter to think how life is. High school is suppose to be the best time of your life not a nightmare. O yes the pressure within the team is a real treat also, with all the help from the coach, If you try get help from the coach with this your are a trouble maker.

O yes parent, iam proud of you sitting back and watch your daughter subjected to this, just so she can play ball or MIGHT get a scholarship at some school. If you let daughter be put through this , your are treating your daughter just like the coach,

I know for a fact the high school level is different with boy friends ,cars,social pressure. and you as a coach need to get into their head so they will keep there head in the game. But to use these kind of teaching skills would never work in the class room. You would in most cases loose your job.

I guess iam just to old fashion been on the girls side of this. This is an opinion from what i see and hear. If i offend you , just say the old man is crazy.

[std]

I don't see many high school coaches as you describe them. I see a lot of good coaches or coaches that are doing their best. Sure there are som "I'm only in it for the suppliment" coaches but I think they are the minority. I have seen a lot of private instructor brainwashed kids that think the only way is the private instructor's way and this makes them very difficult to coach. Most high school coaches make about 1/100th of the cost of a private instructor. Sell your story somewhere else.

[changeup]

please, tell it to someone else you must not have a daughter or your daughter is a pet of the coach. This goes on at most school I know there are afew that it don't but when you have to go home and watch your child cry because of being subject to unfair treatment then the story is different. Now I would not have responded to this thrend if the sell your story did'nt come up but when my daughter comes on coach T she should not see this kind of comment. You do not know her or her coach so lets just leave it at everyone should have a fair change no matter who their instructors, parents or coaches are.

[QueenBee]

If this is what's going on at your child's school, then why would you tolerate it?...If it is going on, and a majority of the parents approached the administration with real facts, real proof, I can't see a school system in the state allowing a coach to abuse his players...

 

If you're angry because your daughter is not starting, or isn't playing the position she wants to play...then don't make generalizations...

 

I don't think people realize how much time and effort goes into coaching a team, and for parents to badmouth ALL coaches for the action of a FEW, that is wrong...These men and women take time from their own families, they spend their own money...to benefit these kids...and only for the love of the game...and a dedication to kids...If you think it's because of the paltry supplements they make...you are so wrong...

 

When it comes down to it...the coach is going to be the one that makes the decisions concerning the team...wouldn't it be better to try to work things out and support the team???...

 

One thing that disturbs me about some of the comments that are posted is that it's very seldom about the TEAM...it's usually about ONE player...I've yet to see ONE player beat a TEAM...

[Patriot97]

ANY parent can attend college and earn a degree in Education. Once completed that parent can coach in high school all he/she wants. Until then.............

[Sidetrain]

I'm not sure what happen to start this tread but I've seen both sides of this issue. It how each person takes it. The parent may have had a bad day at work and hear a coach( Man or Women) say something to their daughter and the top blows. In some cases the coach is a teacher also and a student may had done something in school and it set him or her off. If you pay someone to teach you daughter to play softball you may need to understand that the insturtor is just that an insturtor not you child team coach. Each caoch has their way but that make it total right nor does it make the insturtor right. Practice makes perfect that what counts. If they don't practice then they only have themsleves to blame not the coaches or a teammate

[cornpup]

It's amazing how people suddenly have selective memory when they are offended. Time and time again I see people totally disregarding what someone else's post stated. Catchman said "not all coaches practice this", heck he even put it in capital letters for ya. STD, you wrote, sure there are a few I'm only in it for the supplement coaches, but they are a minority. This kind of stuff is exactly what I'm talkin' about. Catchman never wrote one word or insinuated in any way that these coaches that he's upset with are in it for financial gain. I'm sorry but it makes me sick to my stomach when people put words into other people's mouths just because they take something someone else writes personal. I have found that this is common practice here on coacht. STD, I take it you're a coach and probably run a very good program. I would guess that nothing catchman wrote would apply to the way things are ran at your school. However, you are only familiar with what goes on at your school not the thousands of other schools out there. I take it catchman is a private instructor which would expose him to what goes on with many different programs because kids that he teaches sre from many different schools. And I would have to agree that it would be very frustrating as a player or a parent of one that has spent their whole offseason working on hitting, pitching, fielding, mechanics, etc.. only to have the coach say "well forget all that, now you're gonna do it my way". Now with that being said, if the instructor has no credentials, a proven track record, many years of experience, etc.. then it's a whole different story, and there are probably as many inexperienced prvate instructors out there as there are coaches. That's an exageration but clueless instructors do exist, I won't name any names. STD and catchman, if I'm wrong about you guys then correct me, but my thoughts stay the same, just replace your names with a coach and an instructor. But please please please please please read a post carefully and stop putting words into people's mouths just because it offends you. Did I say please, if not then PLEEEEEEAAAAAAASE!!!!!!!!

[CoachSR]

I read the original post...never once thought about Catch being an instructor...and took it one way. He has a daughter on a team that has a coach that yells and swears alot. I take it that he's paid alot of hard earned money to have instructors teach his daughter...only to have a "non-instructing" HS coach tell her she needs to forget what they taught her and do things his/her way.

 

Frustrating to say the least.

 

But isn't life like that ? My daughter has been subjected to the same thing....more than a few times. She comes to me and says...."What the heck am I supposed to do Dad" ??? So I tell her.....let the swearing roll right off your back...and try to find something good about what he/she is saying....and just add that to what you've learned. If you take every coach that you have had....and walk away with only the "good stuff".....you walk away a MUCH better player. Now how do you decide what the good stuff and the bad stuff is ? You try it....and if it works...it's good stuff

 

As far as the swearing or "adjustings onesself"

 

Look at this coach daily. Yea...go to practice and watch. You DO have this right. You may not be able to hear what he/she is saying....but you can tell what's going on. And....if it's something disrepctful to the girls...DO something about it. You have lots of avenues you can take. (not gunna go into them because we all know what they are)

 

All in all....if you have a strong kid (which is what we parents make them away from the softball field) then she will make it though just fine. I always tell me girls this:

 

There's not a single coach out there that can steal your dream....if you don't give them the power to do so.

 

[Guest softball247]

And I say, let the child's natural ability shine through and forget trying to force them into this "cookie cutter" player mold. If something is working, don't fix it!!!!

[Nsane]

I am really not trying to add fuel to the fire, but I was wondering if coming to watch practice is a daily thing or just a one-time thing? When I played parents didn't come to practice. This didn't make them bad parents, it just meant that the coach got paid to coach and the parents trusted or allowed them to do just that...coach. Is it just a softball thing or is this a widely used practice? Is it the way that coaches coach now is different, or is it the fact that kids are changing? Just curious.

[Edited by Nsane on 3-10-03 10:55A]

[sportnut]

Nsane, we are very involved with our children and take an active role in everything they do. I'm not sure what our attending practice has to do with anything. Have you had a bad experience?

[kayjay]

Private instruction is fine BUT I find that most of the time, that private instruction may not take into consideration that the other players on a team may not have had the same advantage and the COACH may need that privately tutored player to adjust to the other talent (or lack of it). So, my comment is LET THE COACH COACH!!! The coach is the only one responsible for the progress or lack of it for the team, and second guessing him or her without being there everyday to see what he is facing is not very fair.

On the other side, there is never any excuse for a coach to swear at a player or show tacky behavior, but some kids only respond to a raised voice.