BEST BUSH LEAGUE COMMENT YOU'VE HEARD

[straightbill307]

To: Freshman

 

"go get the Bullpen key", when you have no lock to the bullpen and they spend countless DAYS looking for it!

"go get the left handed bats"

"go get the Knuckleballs"

 

Write this kid a tardy slip, hes late. (Late swing)

[putboobieincoach]

coach writes 4-3 in the stat book. freshman asks what does four three mean??? drives me crazy!!!

 

guy gets backwards k... the pitcher said can i help you, and the batter said nah just lookin.

 

another thing that bothers me is when a player throws the bat to the dugout on a close pitch with three balls and the ump calls it a strike. im gonna ask riverdale this one, does that just make you wanna ring somebody up???

[riverdaleman]

coach writes 4-3 in the stat book. freshman asks what does four three mean??? drives me crazy!!!

 

guy gets backwards k... the pitcher said can i help you, and the batter said nah just lookin.

 

another thing that bothers me is when a player throws the bat to the dugout on a close pitch with three balls and the ump calls it a strike. im gonna ask riverdale this one, does that just make you wanna ring somebody up???

if you are asking me?....i have been know to call strke 3 on a kid who thought it was ball 4 but it isnt because of him thrwoing the bat thinking it was ball four it was becasue i thought it was strike 3 LOL you know what i mean..his action doesnt cause mine

[JHITE7]

1. "Nice route...you look like Helen Keller out there..."

 

(Spoken when an outfielder takes a bad angle.)

 

2. "Nice paddles meat...do those double as ping pong paddles?

 

3. "Couldnt catch herpes in a #####house."

 

4. "Is that that kids legs or is he riding a ostrich?" (Kid with skinny legs)

 

5. "Last time I saw legs that skinny they had a message tied to them."

 

6. Last...I heard a coach actually tell an umpire on his way out of the park..."You are a pimple on the A## of baseball."

Edited April 11, 2007 by JHITE7

[jenbug]

bump

[Mi Kees]

" I never threw an illegal pitch. The trouble is, once in a while I toss one that ain't never been seen by this generation." Satchel Paige Quoted in the Washington Post, June 10, 1982

[Mi Kees]

"When I was a little boy, I wanted to be a baseball player and join a circus. With the Yankees I've accomplished both." Graig Nettles Just for all you Kees fans (CheroKEES not YanKEES)

[where's the love?]

The pitcher had just given up a homerun. The infielders come to the mound to meet. The firstbaseman says to the pitcher, "When we play against each other in summer league, throw me that pitch."

[GC Grizzlies]

Most of my favorites have been told already, but here are a couple more good ones.

Turn your blinker off! -When a pitcher makes a pickoff move.

Who's driving that Cab? - After a hitter crushes one.

Does your Mama know you've got her skillet out here? - When a player makes an error.

[hasbeen7]

While coaching a 10 yr old summer team, we had just played a weaker team and beat them pretty bad. Going thru the line at the end of the game I overheard one of their players ( a pudgy kid with glasses who seemed to be relieved the game was over and that he had escaped injury) telling our kids as he met each one -- "good game, good game, thanks for the a## whoopin, good game, good game, thanks for the a## whoopin, etc. Thought I was gonna die!!

[LCborn]

All from the same coach:

 

On a road trip: "You don't need maps; if you get lost, just follow me."

 

To a future all-stater: "You don't have what it takes to be a good high-school player."

 

About his shortstop: "He's too slow to play anywhere else, so he's gotta play shortstop."

 

About his hitting philosophy: "Hit ground balls and they won't get us out--choke and poke." About his pitching philosophy: "Make them hit ground balls and we'll get them out--make them choke and poke."

 

About motivation: "If we lose it's all your fault and I'll put your gear in the parking lot."

 

About job security: "My Dad is big in local politics."

 

About winning and losing: "We won 28 games agains weenies so our 0-16 conference record doesn't represent what a good job I did."

[MilanDog9]

While playin ball in college, we were playin a rival team. During a poor pick-off attempt from the opposing pitcher, one of our players yelled, "I'VE SEEN BETTER PICKS IN AN AFRO!!!" Everyone got a kick out of that, even the opposing team. The pitcher actually had to step off because he started laughing...