Parents and Coaches....

[0u812]

bhscoach you mentioned in a earlier post that if only a parent could see practice then they would understand why jon plays and mike doesn't. How many times have you let parents sit in on practices? And if you haven't why not?

[thecull]

No way should a parent or guardian ever question a coach about the playing time their kid is getting. The coaches are getting paid very little, are not getting to be very involved in their own families during the season, and are generally run ragged, scouting other teams and prep time for their games.

 

If you are a parent and you are questioning your sons or daughters playing time then you you are doing a great dis-service to your child. Most kids who work hard in practice get playing time. If the kid wants more playing time then he needs to spend more time in the gym.....believe me the coach will notice any improvement.

[bhscoach]

bhscoach you mentioned in a earlier post that if only a parent could see practice then they would understand why jon plays and mike doesn't. How many times have you let parents sit in on practices? And if you haven't why not?

 

 

Ou812, We have parents show up and watch practice a bunch. I think it's important to let parents see what is going on in the program and then it lets them know exactly why "john" is playing more than "mike". They have brought their padded bleacher chairs and just sat there and watched. Letting them do this will let them see why their child isn't getting the playing time that they think they deserve. Yes there are times that we have closed practices but it's not very often. We don't let parents come to tryouts because we think it puts extra pressure on their child knowing that not only are the coaches evaluated me but my parents are also in the stands adding extra pressure but that's the only time they are not allowed. I'm talking in this situation about the parents that you never see watching practice and always complaining about their childs playing time.

[Jesus Is Lord]

All you coaches out there who insist on closed practices could learn something from this man. JMO

 

Don't you guys think that players would maybe try and put on a show for mom and dad at an open practice. What if mom and dad sat in on a class? Would they behave differently? I don't have closed practices, but I don't encourage people to come and watch them either. Just a thought.

[jamieroper]

Nope...Never.

 

The coach wants to win and should have the best intrest of his team in his mind, parents have to repesct that.

What dad, after shooting hoops in the front yard with his son, doesnt think his child is better than the next player. You have to trust the coaches that see all the players in practice everyday.

 

I agree with you in part. Most of the time parents should keep quite. They should NEVER say anything in front of the kids. And yes, most parents think their child is the next MJ. But I have seen too many situations where who someone is kin to or who has a family member on the BOE decides who gets to play. My son fought against that in high school for 4 years. He had 3 coaches boys and 1 coaches nephew on the team. And they were not 4 of the 5 best, but they played all the time. My son never quit and as a senior, he played just about every minute of every game. But he had to put forth twice the effort of any of those 4 to get the same playing time. Several of his teammates did quit. Even though my son got his playing time as a senior, the coach’s attitude hurt the team. Our best post player played point guard because he was the assistant coache's nephew. His uncle and daddy knew that at 6'2", that if he wanted to play in college, that he needed to play the point. So my son had to play post at 6'0". He did well, however, playing a postposition possibly cost him a chance to play guard in college. The sad part is the coach was our assistant pastor and music director at our church. I thought if anyone was above the politics that he would be. But he wasn't. I have never said anything about it but I no use for him to this day. There are far too few coaches that are above the politics. If your program has one, hang onto him.

[jamieroper]

Ou812, We have parents show up and watch practice a bunch. I think it's important to let parents see what is going on in the program and then it lets them know exactly why "john" is playing more than "mike". They have brought their padded bleacher chairs and just sat there and watched. Letting them do this will let them see why their child isn't getting the playing time that they think they deserve. Yes there are times that we have closed practices but it's not very often. We don't let parents come to tryouts because we think it puts extra pressure on their child knowing that not only are the coaches evaluated me but my parents are also in the stands adding extra pressure but that's the only time they are not allowed. I'm talking in this situation about the parents that you never see watching practice and always complaining about their childs playing time.

 

You have the right idea. Isn't it funny how sometimes parents can watch and still think that someone who is an average player is the next high school to nba lottery pick? I believe that except in special circumstances that parents should be allowed to watch practice. However, kids should give the coach 100% of their attention. If the kid is looking into the stands to get advise from mom or dad, that can be a problem.

[The General]

Never. Not even if the coach is wrong.

[Pantherbert]

Good parental support is critically important to the success of a team but not at the expense of the coach being able to do his/her job. My only problems are with those parents who only come to support their child and not the program as a whole. In my mind, every coach, parent, and player from the freshman team through the varsity starters are all one big program. It's like large family, at least to me.

 

 

 

I was talking with one parent earlier this year and he expressed concern because his son, as well as some other boys, may eventually only have one or two years as a starter becuase of players that are ahead of them. (This is funny since I'm not even a coach,lol) I told him I looked at it this way. What would you rather have? Start for 4 years on a bad to "ok" team or start for one year but every year be a very good, maybe even championship caliber team? A large part of White Station's success was the willingness of some great players, who could have averaged 20-25 pts. a night on lesser teams, to buy into the concept of building that program and put together several championship teams. I'm not saying every school can have that level of success and I understand every family has to do what's right for them. My point is that just as group of kids have work as a single unit to be successful on the floor, it also takes teamwork by those of us who don't pace the sidelines or put on the jerseys.

Edited February 20, 2006 by Pantherbert

[Tnbreakers]

I tell my parents from day one that playing time is not negotiable. I will be more than happy to discuss any situation with them as long as you call me or approach me off the court. Do not approach me in the heat of the battle or you may not get the response you want to hear. I would suggest setting up some time that is conveinent for both parties and talk with the coach abour the situation, but spin it in a way that is more in line with, what are some things my son or daughter can do to improve their chances of moving up in the rotation. In all my years of coaching I have never run into a coach who would not play the better player unless the player was of suspect charachter or there we other conflict issues involved with disciplinary problems. If you are a coach you just need to remember one key thinhg when dealing with parents. MOST PARENTS COME TO THE GAMES TO SEE THEIR KIDS PLAY AND NOT THE TEAM PLAY! That's just the way it is.

[speedo]

I agree, We have a meet the players night where the parents come to practice. They watch us coach there kid and we don't hold any thing back becuase they are there. Then we meet with them and tell them "we will talk to you about anything about your child but playing time or any other kids playing time. We discuss it up front and then that is it.

[PrepFanatic]

 

I agree with you in part. Most of the time parents should keep quite. They should NEVER say anything in front of the kids. And yes, most parents think their child is the next MJ. But I have seen too many situations where who someone is kin to or who has a family member on the BOE decides who gets to play. My son fought against that in high school for 4 years. He had 3 coaches boys and 1 coaches nephew on the team. And they were not 4 of the 5 best, but they played all the time. My son never quit and as a senior, he played just about every minute of every game. But he had to put forth twice the effort of any of those 4 to get the same playing time. Several of his teammates did quit. Even though my son got his playing time as a senior, the coach's attitude hurt the team. Our best post player played point guard because he was the assistant coache's nephew. His uncle and daddy knew that at 6'2", that if he wanted to play in college, that he needed to play the point. So my son had to play post at 6'0". He did well, however, playing a postposition possibly cost him a chance to play guard in college. The sad part is the coach was our assistant pastor and music director at our church. I thought if anyone was above the politics that he would be. But he wasn't. I have never said anything about it but I no use for him to this day. There are far too few coaches that are above the politics. If your program has one, hang onto him.

 

Happens everywhere man, its sad but so true. Small towns are the worst.

[doc_6]

I agree with you in part. Most of the time parents should keep quite. They should NEVER say anything in front of the kids. And yes, most parents think their child is the next MJ. But I have seen too many situations where who someone is kin to or who has a family member on the BOE decides who gets to play. My son fought against that in high school for 4 years. He had 3 coaches boys and 1 coaches nephew on the team. And they were not 4 of the 5 best, but they played all the time. My son never quit and as a senior, he played just about every minute of every game. But he had to put forth twice the effort of any of those 4 to get the same playing time. Several of his teammates did quit. Even though my son got his playing time as a senior, the coach’s attitude hurt the team. Our best post player played point guard because he was the assistant coache's nephew. His uncle and daddy knew that at 6'2", that if he wanted to play in college, that he needed to play the point. So my son had to play post at 6'0". He did well, however, playing a postposition possibly cost him a chance to play guard in college. The sad part is the coach was our assistant pastor and music director at our church. I thought if anyone was above the politics that he would be. But he wasn't. I have never said anything about it but I no use for him to this day. There are far too few coaches that are above the politics. If your program has one, hang onto him.

 

This coach sounds like he was coaching at a private school where he's not judged on wins and losses. Too often, that's not the case, and the coach is going to play the best post player in the post. It is not unheard of in high school coaching to put college prospects in a position to display abililties that a college recruiter might not see if a concerted effort is not made, but most coaches will utilize an offense that will allow that prospect to show the skills that will be transferable to the college level. When this occurs, everyone is better for it.