Coach Bashing

[compusatman]

Hey Stan, maybe you had better think before you go on here "bashing" other people yourself. You said that we didn't have the guts to go talk to the coach face to face. Since you brought it up, I'm going to share my experience with you.

 

Our son was being harassed by his own team members, over and over again. After giving the coach adequate time to take care of this, we went to him out of respect for our son. To our face, he promised that he would take care of the situation. Unfortunately, the players involved were in the starting line-up each week and that never happened.

 

The end result? Our son was unable to take any more and out of self defense was forced to turn in his equipment. He spent his senior year watching the team that he loved from the student section. The coach hasn't spoken to my family in 2 years.

 

Now you tell me, WHO'S THE COWARD???

 

I'm sure someone will mock my post in this thread because this is actually another thread but this situation happened to me when I played. I don't think the coach can fight a players battles for him. It can be dog eat dog in the dressing room and the only cure for this disease is on the field (practice) performance. I endured it and finally got tired of it and fought my way to a starting position albeit, an aternate position than my natural position but still a starting one. Then and only then did I get respect. If you as a parent were not a player then you may not understand this anomoly. However, it is basic instinct...survival of the fittest. It is definately ruthless but it is natures way. For the coach not to speak to you...well I don't know about that but for you to ask him to fight your sons battles was perhaps nursing your sons maturity. Could be that the situation was very much out of hand and needed some intervention but in most cases these things are truly..."defining moments". And in the long run are essential training for ones well being. I'm not saying you did the wrong thing because I cannot make that judgement but I think overall those kinds of situations are best left to work themselves out naturally. Parenting is a call to greatness and sometimes it is difficult to be silent and allow your teachings to find their path.

[BDURHAM]

therealtruth02,

 

It must have been difficult for you and your son.

Not to diminish your personal issue with the coach,

but you are not saying all coaches are cowards

are you?

 

Have you bashed this coach on the message boards?

 

 

Hey Stan, maybe you had better think before you go on here "bashing" other people yourself. You said that we didn't have the guts to go talk to the coach face to face. Since you brought it up, I'm going to share my experience with you.

 

Our son was being harassed by his own team members, over and over again. After giving the coach adequate time to take care of this, we went to him out of respect for our son. To our face, he promised that he would take care of the situation. Unfortunately, the players involved were in the starting line-up each week and that never happened.

 

The end result? Our son was unable to take any more and out of self defense was forced to turn in his equipment. He spent his senior year watching the team that he loved from the student section. The coach hasn't spoken to my family in 2 years.

 

Now you tell me, WHO'S THE COWARD???

Edited October 18, 2006 by StanTrott

[GLee]

Then I suppose you are more disappointed than anyone. I along with many others expected Betsy to be a real threat at the beginning of the season.

 

I suppose we can learn a lot from your words. I have seen many from Betsy complain and tear into this year and I really can understand because you expected more.

 

He is a good QB and I wish him luck the rest of the season and at the next level if he wants to play. Let us know if he does play after Highschool and where.

 

 

I appreciate the kind words. Yes, Preston will play at the next level but he is not a true QB, but an athlete posing as one. He is being recruited as a WR and a DB/FS. He has a standing offer now on baseball, which is his preference.

 

As far as this season, Preston couldn't be more disappointed. This team has eroded since their freshman and JV seasons. Not being 'pushed' and a severe lack of discipline (Stan, I promise I'm not bashing anyone ) is what I see. With that said, the heart of these guys hasn't been there as a team. It has been trully sad to watch the erosion of a good team. This is all a first for Preston (losing) so hopefully lessons will be learned that he can pass on to others one day. He longs to be a coach himself , hopefully at the college level where mommy & daddy are moreso isolated. Again, thanks.

[GLee]

 

My point was that I am not a coward, and sitting down and talking with a coach hardly ever changes things.

 

 

And as I posted earlier on this thread, there are the coaches who listen but don't hear.......preoccupied with other thoughts as you try to talk with them. Then there are the unapproachables........enough said on that one. Then comes the true coaches that listen with a true, caring ear but are not in a position to change anything..........these guys feel the pain.

Edited October 18, 2006 by GLee

[JHITE7]

I'll give my two cents worth after reading these 5 pages...

 

I have been on both ends of the spectrum, both as a player and now as a coach myself. My first instinct is to think that as a coach you would never want to have anyone have a bad word against you. But considering this is not a PERFECT world that will never happen. I do however believe that if you have a legitimate beef with a coach as a player or a parent it should FIRST be handled behind closed doors. Much in the cliche what happens in the lockerroom stays in the lockerroom. That would stop alot of the larger catastrophes of going behind others backs like I have heard on here.

 

My second instinct is to come to this realization...If you let what other people say about you bother you...YOU ARE IN THE WRONG PROFESSION! At any given time players and or parents can change the way they "like you." Most the time "likeness" is a direct result of playing time. That's why I strive, and most other coaches strive not to be "liked"...but to be respected.

 

Lastly, in all honesty not to take anything away from this board. Most coaches do not care what is posted on here. Especially since more than likely any football coach in the area if they are really doing their job correctly, they don't have time to check message boards. I do think that flat out bashing a coach without merit is a bad thing to do, and yes it can be a cowardly situation to bash them hiding behind a monocre on here. But it's gonna happen as long as coaches continue coaching, and fans continue watching. But in light of things that happened just last week with Cory Lidle...IT IS JUST A GAME! I myself get caught up in the winning and losing and competition...but things like that put everything in perspective quickly.

[rcpatriot]

anyone know how many "volunteer" coaches, total, there are in TN? How about faculty coachs, total? Wonder why "volunteer" coach positions are growing each year? Is it to save money? Could be. Could it be because the "coach bashing" is being taken to another level these days?

Yes, I'm a volunteer coach at the HS level as well as the MS level. This being my 23rd year of coaching at one level or the other, I have been openly, as well as privately "bashed" for decisions I've made/not made, style of coaching, etc. I knew that was "part of the job" when I first became a coach. I've sat in the stands watching my own kids play and questioned/bashed coaches as well. Not proud of it, but admittingly have done it.

The level that it's been taken to by some today is borderline slanderish (?). It's one thing to question (bash) play calling, schemes, style of coaching, discipline, etc. But, when you question a coaches character and integrity it becomes personal.

Unfortuantely, when it gets to this point (most of the time) it is about "Johnny" not playing enough, not teaching him correctly, losing. Basically the disgruntled parent. Usually, the disgruntled parent will sit in the stands voicing opinions with others, or should I say selling their opinions, get in the car voicing those concerns to little "Johnny", day in and day out. Now little "Johnny" has no faith in what the coaches are teaching or doing. Imagine this happening with over half your parents and their child. Hard to teach kids when the parents have striped all your credability with the kids.

Back to my first few questions. Again, why is "volunteer" coaching becoming more prevalent in MS and HS sports today?

What are we as parents expecting from coaches? Maybe I missed it, but no one has ever given me the "bible", if you will, on coaching. I'm still waiting.

[lax4life32]

Ive seen people talkin about threads gettin too drawn out and stuff so they get deleted and yeah i think its about time this one is done its the same stuff over and over and its kinda gettin old.

[carl spackler]

Did anyone watch the Riverdale/McCallie game? Here is a case that could call for some coach bashing. Is it right, no, we however should be critical of Riverdale's Coach. He made a mistake, hopefully he has learned from it, and they will be a threat again to win the State Championship. Randy Sanders on the otherhand observed many bashes last year that were not deserved, should we have been so critical yes, but bash no.

 

I say coach bashing is COWARDLY. We are not down there making the calls, but there are instances in which we can second guess or be critical. Constructive criticism is a great way to learn, but I truly believe we are in the stands and they are on the field for a reason.

[uncfan13]

To paraphrase more than one high school coach, "90% of the problem is about PT, the other half is political". There's always been a dearth of math skills among many high school coaches. In all seriousness (or with as much seriousness as high school sports merit), coaching is a lofty position. Coaches can have an incredible positive influence on their charges. On the other hand, they can have just the opposite affect. The problem is that winning and losing don't necessarily identify which is which.

[patsfan123]

hehe I played for Coach Greene at Boone. I heard many "THROW THE BALL!!" from fans every single Friday. I guess bashing from fans just doesn't really bother me.

 

And I agree. No coach should be on here. I also think players should stay off while they are playing. Out of the public eye is good for high school football. I just think too much could accidently be said, and then couldn't be taken back.

 

 

I agree!!! Is this a message board for the fans or the coaches? If it is just for the Coaches, state that and lock it down. If the site is for fans, things are going to be said as long as they are not vulgar, they have the right to say it.

[formerblazer]

I agree!!! Is this a message board for the fans or the coaches? If it is just for the Coaches, state that and lock it down. If the site is for fans, things are going to be said as long as they are not vulgar, they have the right to say it.

 

Yea I'll go and say it again. I believe criticizing a coach (and note that doesn't mean in a bashing way, but in a way that looks at an overall perspective and what might change) is ok if it is done in an educated way that merits worth. Bashing a coach senselessly without merit just because one might be upset is stupid. I don't think players should be bashed at all either, unless they do something like break the law or talk loads of trash. But beating up a kid on this board for how they played a game shouldn't be on here. These are kids, it is a game, let them play.

 

Either way, coaches and athletes should stay off here during the season. This should be done simply because bashing might happen or they might give away something they didn't mean to. After the season, come in and talk, join us in conversation.